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With My Eyes Wide Open: Miracles and Mistakes on My Way Back to KoRn
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He left KoRn to help himself. He went back to help others. And along the way, he nearly lost everything.A life-changing spiritual awakening freed Brian “Head” Welch from a stranglehold of drugs and alcohol and prompted him to leave the highly successful nu-metal band KoRn in 2005. What followed was a decade-long trial by fire, from the perils of fathering a teen lost in depression and self-mutilation to the harsh realities of playing solo and surviving the shattering betrayal of a trusted friend. In this intensely inspiring redemption saga, perhaps most inspiring is Brian’s radical decision to rejoin KoRn and reconcile with the tribe of people he once considered family in the metal music scene.Brian returned to his musical roots with a clear head and a devoted heart. Though his story is wild, hilarious, and deeply poignant, the message is simple: God will love you into the freedom of being yourself, as long as you keep the relationship going and never, ever quit.
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Product details
Hardcover: 240 pages
Publisher: Thomas Nelson (May 17, 2016)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0718030605
ISBN-13: 978-0718030605
Product Dimensions:
6.3 x 0.9 x 9.3 inches
Shipping Weight: 14.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
Average Customer Review:
4.8 out of 5 stars
242 customer reviews
Amazon Best Sellers Rank:
#101,261 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
“Wait…KoRn is a satanic band?†That was my initial thought when I found out that Brian Welch had left KoRn. I was confused: it was a song on ‘Issues’ that made me resolve to leave an abusive relationship; it was listening to KoRn that made me want to stay sober. Was I missing something? What happened? I would have given my eye-teeth to have been a ‘rock star’, hugely successful no less, and I couldn’t think of one reason why anyone would want to let that go.I binge read his first three books over a weekend and what emerged was a somewhat sad, albeit familiar, story of a boy who grew up angry and with poor self-esteem, and by hard work and a stroke of good fortune started his early adulthood with fame and wealth complete with all of the privileges and indulgences that accompany it. He was given the golden ticket only to find it took him to a place that was abysmally void. But, as he was to find out, that was the ride, not the destination. He told his story honestly, and at times allowed stabs of unresolved emotion to emerge above the surface, bearing evidence that this was not an autobiography told in full; this was the beginning.WMEWO is what happened during the in between, the life he negotiated with his new found Faith. This is how he fought to be a good father, a successful entrepreneur, continue to engage his talent as a musician, and most of all, be a happy person, and how none of that came easy.I was overjoyed to read about his journey back to KoRn, and the way he can look at his absence not as God taking him away, but as God preparing him to go back. It’s very touching to read the stories of him praying with fans alongside his band mate and brother through Christ, Fieldy. Of course ignorant fans would mock them; it can be overwhelming for those who don’t know to stand in the presence of the Lord.I appreciate the candor he brings to this book, and that he has retained his humor. He shared some deeply personal stories about financial mishaps and near ruin. The challenges of being a single father to his daughter were heart wrenching, but I couldn’t help but find myself thinking how lucky she is to have a father who won’t give up on her, or their relationship.His Faith is a driving force for him that he is eager and unashamed to share. Be you Christian or not, reading about his life so far, his ability to fall, to persevere, and to rise again, is admirable.As for me, I have learned that Brian didn’t have one reason to walk away from a ‘rock star’ life...he had a million. And why he came back was backed by a force far greater than money, fame, and possessions. I love to see life come full circle.
I became a Christian and still messed up my life. I broke many relationships and walked away from God (without admitting it to others or myself). This book is starting to spring hope that God might still care about me. I am worried that he will not accept me as I am now, since I should have known better. A ray of hope is in my heart that He still wants to be with me, and is willing to clean me. Thank you so much for being so messed up, and sharing how much you are loved by God in honesty. I once cursed God too and tore up a bible. It was so encouraging to know that I'm not the only one, and that Gods love is big enough to not only forgive me for my sin, but still wants to grow closer.
With My Eyes Wide Open is Welch’s second book that he has written. In the book, he describes a whole course of decisions dating back to his decision to leave Korn in 2005. From this point on, he describes his life fathering his daughter Jennea, starting his own solo career, finding the light of god, battling depression, drug abuses, starting his own label company, going bankrupt, etc. Welch’s journey that he describes to us is incredibly realistic and dark. It is almost unthinkable to any Korn fan that the same guitarist behind the multi-platinum album Follow the Leader and Issues would not only quit the band, but run into financial problems of all things, as well as caring for his daughter and struggling to even start his own music career. Much like Korn vocalist Jonathan Davis, as well as many of their fans, Welch faces mental health issues and consistently struggles to come to terms with his life, unsurprising given that Korn has touched on the topic religiously in the past, and fans of their music often have some sort of reason to relate to it. In the book, Welch describes an unthinkable amount of hardship and struggle not only with his own life, but with his daughters as well. His only daughter, Jennea, has yet to meet her mother in her entire life, and she had begun to cut herself at the age of 14. Welch gives a very accurate and heartbreaking description of finding out that Jennea was cutting herself. In addition, he gives off a similar tone when describing the process of dropping off her daughter at a specialist hospital that deals with mental health issues. Welch does not take emphasis off his struggles in this book, and even having a second writer almost makes it seem like he wrote the entire book on his laptop while sipping coffee in the airport, waiting for his flight to arrive so he can go home. Overall, the book gives off an incredible string of emotion, much like any Korn song. Welch’s problems are ever present, however he choses to use it in a way that encourages readers to hold on and pull through the struggles of their own problems. Writing and vocabulary is very strong, and this book will not disappoint anyone who is familiar with Welch or his band Korn.
Brian’s book ‘Save Me From Myself’ was so amazing I bought this one the second after I was done reading it. ‘With My Eyes Wise Open’ is a continuation of the story of his life’s journey with Jesus. Equally amazing as his first book I read, he shares his journey of hardships and trials, and of the pain of seeing his own child go through rough times. He writes with such a fantastic sense of humor that it’s hard not to pee your pants laughing even during sad stories of a beloved decomposing hamster. Though I’m already a Christian, both of his books I read have challenged me to be the best person I can be, and have reminded me of the beautiful unfailing love Jesus has towards me. Perfect for Christians as a reminder of Gods true nature and love towards us, and also perfect for NonChristians who want true answers about who Jesus is without seeming too preachy/overbearingly religious. This book has definitely changed my life. Thanks Brian for writing!
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